Think about the filters you use to eliminate people from consideration as potential romantic partners. What characteristics or behaviors lead you to judge others as unattractive? Does Duck's theory make sense to you? Have you ever eliminated someone by using a sociological or pre-interaction cue only to reconsider them based on interaction and cognitive cues?
I agree with Duck’s attraction filter theory. The other day, my male friend told me that he has two guys he can introduce for me. He said, “The first one is good-looking, and the second one is not good-looking. Both are kind but the second one is more kind than the first one. So which one do you want me to introduce?” I thought I am the person who doesn’t care about appearance, but I chose the good-looking guy. Even though a personality is my first priority for choosing a romantic partner, I also judge appearance and eliminate guys using pre-interaction cues.
I also agree with the Duck’s idea of sociological or incidental cues that states, “maintaining contact with someone thousands of miles away is extremely difficult” (158). When I went to the U.S., I have seen many couples separated in the U.S. and Japan. Most of them couldn’t keep their relationships. I believe physical proximity is a big factor for choosing our friends and romantic partners. Thanks to advanced technologies we have today, we can talk or see each other using computers. However, I don’t want to find my partner overseas. Even if I found someone who has cognitive cues in another country, I don’t want to be with the guy unless he will come to Japan or I have happen to go there. This is because sharing the time is an important factor to choose my romantic partner.
Final Post
15 年前
1 件のコメント:
Physical proximity does affect relationships even when we wish it didn't. I can't tell you how many friends I have stopped contact with over the years just because they or I have changed where I live or go to school or where they go to school. Just out of the blue, and you stop talking to you're friends. People will change over time. Some of them you may have had good relationships with too. its no real fault of anyone, I think it's just a matter of management. You can only manage so much in your life and that includes the amount of friends you have. Some of us find ourselves evaluating our relationships with our friends everyday and wonder how long we will probably stay friends with them.
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